{"id":1787,"date":"2026-05-22T15:21:56","date_gmt":"2026-05-22T15:21:56","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/gleamgrid.co.za\/?p=1787"},"modified":"2026-05-22T15:21:56","modified_gmt":"2026-05-22T15:21:56","slug":"7-pizzas-that-shouldve-stayed-as-thoughts","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/gleamgrid.co.za\/index.php\/2026\/05\/22\/7-pizzas-that-shouldve-stayed-as-thoughts\/","title":{"rendered":"7 Pizzas That Should\u2019ve Stayed as Thoughts"},"content":{"rendered":"

Pizza is one of the few foods on Earth that almost everybody agrees on \u2014 which makes it genuinely impressive that these people still found ways to completely ruin it. Every pizza here looks less like a meal and more like a psychological cry for help. Somewhere in Italy, an old man is gripping his chest and whispering \u201cmamma mia\u201d with real pain in his eyes.<\/span><\/p>\n

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This looks like depression on flatbread.<\/span><\/p>\n

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Looks like someone tried to cook italian food entirely from memory after a concussion.<\/span><\/p>\n

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Bro sliced it like he\u2019s feeding ducks at a public park.<\/span><\/p>\n

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This looks like a gender reveal party exploded on dough.<\/span><\/p>\n

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They pulled this straight from Pompeii and still tried charging full price.<\/span><\/p>\n

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This pizza looks rich and disgusting at the same time.<\/span><\/p>\n

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This is the kind of pizza a medieval king would eat before dying at 34 from gout.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Pizza is one of the few foods on Earth that almost everybody agrees on \u2014 which makes it genuinely impressive that these people still found ways to completely ruin it….<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1795,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1,2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1787","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-exclusives","category-photo-vault"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/gleamgrid.co.za\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1787","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/gleamgrid.co.za\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/gleamgrid.co.za\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gleamgrid.co.za\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gleamgrid.co.za\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1787"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/gleamgrid.co.za\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1787\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1796,"href":"https:\/\/gleamgrid.co.za\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1787\/revisions\/1796"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gleamgrid.co.za\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1795"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/gleamgrid.co.za\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1787"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gleamgrid.co.za\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1787"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gleamgrid.co.za\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1787"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}